MY BOOK by MIKEY

MY BOOK   by   MIKEY

Hi everyone. 

I’ve been home for a week now and I have been amazingly unproductive. Family, friends and associates that I deal with on a regular basis know the pattern. For those who don’t, I go through a process that others who are in stressful occupations call decompression. I call it decomposing because of the musical implications but partly because I’m close to dead when I get home. 

I’ll borrow from one of my other posts here because it’s appropriate.

In seven days I:

Emptied my suitcase on the floor

Tortured two pianos and a guitar

Did two weeks worth of newspaper sudokus and New York Times crosswords

Slept on all three of my couches

That’s about it.

My girlfriend Kim visited for a few days and left bored. She will dispute this but the Zombie-like look in her eyes after just half a day and the fact that she slept sixteen hours during one twenty-four hour period sort of gave it away. Her dog, a feisty, large, very protective Border Collie/Tyrannosaurus Rex mix was so bored he stopped barking at my cats. 

As an aside, the dog’s name is Gibson but Kim calls him Fluffy because of his sheep-like coat. This is a guard dog with serious attack capabilities. I almost learned that the hard way on my first visit to her place. 

I’ve pointed out to Kim that eventually her dog will suffer self-esteem issues with a name like Fluffy and become an effete lump who’s only daily function will be to turn two pounds of dog chow into ten pounds of shit. Even Gibson isn’t an appropriate name for an animal that salivates at the thought of eating the mailman.

Spike, Bloodrunner, Jaws, Shredder…….

For a week after one of our uber intense, take no prisoners, new city every night trips, I’m not Mr. Excitement. I’m Perry Como, not James Brown, Mother Theresa, not Sarah Silverman. There are only a few of my friends who understand this and they’re all in the industry so they’ve experienced it.

Nevertheless, I came up with a good idea during my suspended animation. I wrote a book a number of years ago. It was never published. I called it simply: MY BOOK by MIKEY

Only a few people ever read it and that’s just as well. It took forever to belabour just a few points I was trying to make. I’ve come up with a new approach that uses far less words. More like MY ESSAY by MIKEY. As a result, I’m going to put a few excerpts in my blog.

If you’ve been reading my blog for at least a year you will already have been exposed to some of the ideas in my book. The Albert Einstein stuff and any references to a benevolent universe are examples………so I’ll just leave them out..

The first chapter deals with the concepts of Quality and Quantity. 

It’ll be a week or so before I get it out there and it might not be worth the wait but I’ll leave it to you, the readers, to pass judgement. Personally, I think it’s brilliant but as Rick and Carter never tire to remind me……… “Heffernan, you’re full of shit”